There are a couple of things that I’ve been meaning to talk to you about. One that I’m pretty sure you’ve already figured out and another that may come as a surprise to you …because it goes against what tradition would have you expect.
The part you have already figured out, is how much I love that young man by your side. As much as you chose to love him as you spent time with him and got to know him. For me the love was different arriving; I had nine months of anticipation before I saw his tiny face. I knew I would love my child, but this love knocked me for a loop.
It was different from that fierce momma bear love that I feel for him now, that grew over time. This was more of an instantaneous adoration and was bigger and different than any love I’ve felt before.
As the years passed and that baby grew, my love for this wee person grew to heights that I had never known before. This brand of love hit me like a ton of bricks on day one and has been walloping me ever since. This kind of love- Mommy love…is one that I’m hoping you will feel for yourself, one day when you are ready.
All this, I suspect that you already know. 🙂
The part that you may not have figured out yet, is that YOU are an extension of that love. You are his chosen one. You are his person and his choice for partner-in-life and because of that you are my choice as well.
The relationship that I have with him, is extended in the one that I have with you. To me, it matters just as much.
I will say, that over the years, as I have gotten to know you, I have developed a love and respect for you as well. I admire the person you are. I admire Your mind for your drive and your strength, and I admire your heart for your compassion and joy. I am proud of you.
As I have grown to love you as your very own person, I also love how good you are to him. The way you make him smile and the way you two have joined together to create a life of adventure and love. This too has endeared me to you.
Now we may at times disagree and we may even fall out, but don’t worry or fuss over this in any way- it will always be short lived. These things are normal in any relationship, and I’m sure we will have our fair share as well. Feel confident that I will want to make up with you. I will always work towards getting along with you.
That young man that we have in common is the one who we both try to make very happy. His contentment matters to us both. The only way for us to be to 100% successful at that, is as a team. His heart cannot be content if he’s at odds with his old mudder…and I know for sure, this is likewise with you.
My vow to you, dear Daughter in law, is to always do my part to ensure that you and I get along. That I always will work towards having a very good relationship with him and also with you.
Always count on me to be on your team and your cheerleader. Have confidence in that.
Your Mom in law.,
Wow, such a wonderful, heart felt letter.You and they are so very blessed.
So many could learn so much by reading this!